Misinformed Reviews #4: My Bloody Valentino – m p 3

my bloody valentino m p 3

After literally 220 years, we finally get what we’re entitled to: a new My Bloody Valentino record.

M P 3 is a nice album. Everyone know Kevin Yields (head priest of My Bloody Tarantino) is an audio-file, so it’s no wonder he would name his album after the audio format most universally celebrated for it’s superior sound quality. Everything was recorded and produced digitally, so none of that stupid analog stuff to mess everything up. If you’ve seen Dave Gruel’s new movie Sound City you know exactly why analog sucks yucky balls and digital is the way of the future (Trent Reznor and Psy for reference).

The album was so popular that I couldn’t get my Internet to work. It was a bummer because I couldn’t forward Obama Kenyan petitions to my friends and families.  Thanks a lot, Kelvin.

My Bloody Valiant’s last album Lovelist helped define the genre of songs about sneakers (shoemusic) and now M P 3 continues that trend and reaches to new heights. These are great songs to play at Famous Footwear and Foot Locker. Although, I could also hear them at Journey’s. But this is definitely not your mom and dad’s shoemusic. ‘Cause it’s loud and parents don’t like loud music. Parents just don’t understand :/.

Opening track “she found now” is talking about a girl finding a Now That’s What I Call Music compilation. It’s also about shoes too. The song “new shoe” is pretty cool but I could like it more than I do, ya know? The first songs are like, “I like music I used to play” and the last songs are all like “k.” But the last songs are angry at the first songs because they don’t pay enough attention to them so they act out. The first songs ask where the last songs have been all night and the last songs just say “out” and the first songs say “can you elaborate?” and the last songs say “why do you care? you don’t even know me!” and the first songs are like “k.”

The last song “wonder 2” is complicated and I like simple things so I don’t listen to it. It’s sort of like listening to a really experimental song. Sort of.  I hope his keyboard starts working so he can use his shift key. It makes me sad that he makes good music but doesn’t have a shift key.

All in all, Yields owed this to us. We have sang his praises and burned his incesteses with hopes he would be loyal and finally he gave us what he promised. He did not forsake us. We had the right to hear this album. If he didn’t deliver we would have the right to moan and mope even more. So lets listen to this today and complain tomorrow about the follow-up not coming out.

My Bloody VariousArtists could use a little bit of distortion or something (it was a little bit too clean and reserved for me) and maybe some guitars, but they are a promising music group.

I give this album 99 out 98 shoes (trying to be festive).

Previous Misinformed Review: The 2x’s Band – Cokesist

Follow me on Twitter: @DustyEffinHenry

Advertisements

A 21 Year-Old on 20 Years of “Nevermind”

At 21 years old, it’s easy to dismiss my input on the legacy of Nirvana because, well, I wasn’t there when it happened. However, I think this also qualifies me as the perfect person to attest to the influence and relevancy of the band that surpasses any claims of a “musical fad.”

I wasn’t introduced to Nirvana by Nevermind. Nor was I introduced to them by any sort of hype (surprisingly enough, being raised in Western Washington). It was on my 14th birthday that I picked up Nirvana’s self-titled Greatest Hits album. I’d seen it there several times and was intrigued by their name. I bought it on a whim. I know, it’s the lamest introduction ever.

There were a few things that initially stuck me with Nirvana. First of all, it saved me from the terrible early 2000s rap-rock of Linkin Park and Papa Roach that I was starting to get into. It was a new sound (new to me) unlike anything else I’d heard. Then there was the emotion. Being 14 years old, even if things are fine, you tend to feel like you suddenly have all this emotion that no one relates too. Hearing Kurt Cobain singing lines like “I’m so ugly, but that’s okay cause so are you” felt like confessions that you could never find the words for.

Around my junior or senior year of high school, I started fading away from Nirvana. I maintained a respect for them, but the less I listened to them I grew scared that if I went back I wouldn’t feel the same way.

Now its 20 years since Nevermind . The buzz of Nirvana in the air and the media lately has inspired me to look at that album again. No, the songs don’t feel the same that they did then, but I’m not the same person. I also don’t think I truly understood Cobain like I thought I did. He wasn’t dealing with high school crushes; he was talking about things that even now I cannot fully relate to.

I imagine maybe it’s a similar thing for those who were there for Nevermind’s release. So many people listened to that record and related to its gloom and doom. Cobain clearly had issues, but it seemed like he was speaking for an entire generation with the same issues. In hindsight, Cobain was in a different league of problems. Music history may see him as a martyr, but I feel like maybe the greatest tragedy is that we thought we understood him and didn’t do anything about it.

Nevermind stands as a testament of a musical movement, a breakthrough in emotional transparency in music, and a tragic story of a man who changed a genre and whose potential may never be fully known. In another 20 years I’m sure there will still be younger generations picking up Nirvana records and feeling comfort in the distortion of “Smells Like Teen Spirit” or the self loathing of “Something in the Way.”